The Best Way to Sound More Smarterer

by Stephen T. Messenger

June 20, 2023

“Intelligent individuals learn from every thing and every one; average people, from their experiences. The stupid already have all the answers.”  — Socrates

I was recently sitting in on a panel discussion next to some incredibly gifted members. As the questions rolled in, I found myself less focused on my answers and more captivated by the responses from the panel.

Culture dictates that the guy in charge is the smartest, but that’s rarely the case. John Maxwell has a theory that even the smartest person in the room is never as smart as the combined brainpower in the room.  

That said, the best way to sound “more smarterer” is to ask for advice and listen more.

The Experiment

In a study by Harvard and Wharton, two people were placed in a room to solve a problem together.

The first group was told they were graded on how well they solved the problem. The second group was told they were graded on the impression they made on the other person.

The group who thought solving the problem was the challenge was more inclined to ask each other for advice. They wanted to accomplish the task best and leveraged the combined brainpower in the room to do so.

The group who was more focused on making a good impression was 50% less likely to ask each other for advice. They felt asking for help would diminish their perceived competency.

The results were interesting: the individuals who were asked for advice had a higher opinion of the person who didn’t ask for any help. They thought that if the person is asking for “my” help, they must be smart, because they realize that “I” am smart.

How to Seem More Smarterer

1. Be Humble

The first step to knowledge is seeking it. One Proverb talks about how “the way of a fool is right in his own eyes, but a wise man listens to advice.” It’s so easy to think we’re right all the time. My kids love to give me advice on what I’m doing wrong around the house. Even more frustrating, their advice is usually really good. A humble person can accept good advice from any source—and thank them for it afterwards.

2. Be Inquisitive

Ask. Seek. Knock. Knowledge isn’t just going to show up at your door one day. If you want to improve at anything, you have to ask other people. YouTube “How To” videos have changed the way people fix thousands of things around their houses. Whether you’re asking the internet or people, solicit outside advice first and foremost.

3. Ask This Question

“Can you give me any advice?” These six words are more powerful than you realize. Whether you use it with your peers, boss, subordinates, friends, spouse, or children, this question will unlock more trust and respect than you could ever know. I asked my son for advice on a video game we were playing the other day. I could see his eyes light up as he wanted to share his knowledge with me.

How to Sound Dumberer

Name drop. Talk about our accomplishments. Brag. Tell long stories about how we would tackle a project.

People naturally want to talk about their own achievements, present company included. But the more we espouse our own ideas, achievements, and goals, the less the other person is contributing.

This is why professional business coaches are so effective. They’re trained to ask open-ended questions and let the other person come up with answers themselves.

Talk Less, Smile More

To quote Alexander Hamilton’s advice in the musical Hamilton, the best way to sound more smarterer is to listen more. Be engaged, ask questions, and actively seek advice.

If you want to be perceived as respected and intelligent, leverage the incredible knowledge of other people.

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