January 6, 2026
by Stephen T. Messenger
Every year in January, I develop twenty personal, audacious goals to accomplish by the following December. It’s a challenge and a thrill to get them all done, and it encourages me to fulfill my maximum standard, the whole concept of this website.
In the article each year, I come back to this quote from Ellen Johnson Sirleaf: “The size of your dreams must always exceed your current capacity to achieve them. If your dreams do not scare you, they are not big enough.” Trust me, every year, I swear to you that I scare myself with the size of the goals.
This year is different. While I still have a list of things I want to achieve, I’m more focused on becoming the person I want to be. “Doing things” is different from becoming a better version of ourselves. And while action remains the vehicle, becoming a better person is the goal.
Doing Versus Being
I don’t know about you, but I love a good checklist. Sometimes, the first item on my checklist is to create a checklist so I can check something off immediately. I would call this the definition of “doing.” It’s a conscious effort to accomplish something to feel better about myself. This act likely has goodness in many other ways to propel me forward, but ultimately, I’m looking to check a box and move on.
“Being,” in this year’s narrative, is different. It’s about growing as a person, family member, friend, co-worker, neighbor, acquaintance, or stranger. It’s a conscious effort to evolve to positively impact those around us.
Becoming someone better often requires us to accomplish activities that help us grow. While there’s still a checklist and activities to complete, they all serve a common purpose: to make us a better person.
Moving from Doing to Being
This year, I asked myself, “What kind of person do I want to be?” This is harder than figuring out what I want to do. For example, completing a triathlon is a noble goal, but how does that help me in the long run? Fitness fades over time, but mindsets last forever.
So, I first listed the attributes of the kind of person I want to be, then wrote down what that person would do if they were me. The results were enlightening, and I found eight character traits I want to focus on this year.
1. To be… A Mighty Man of God. I will go all in on God and see the fruits of His labor in my life.
2. To be… An Encourager. I seek to lift up my bride, kids, and those around me at all times.
3. To be… A Mentor and Coach. My goal is to help others along in their journeys.
4. To be… Physically Fit. Fresh from surgery, I will return to my former fitness levels.
5. To be… Adventurous. If there is fun to be had, I will be the first to raise my hand.
6. To be… An Improved Writer. Through reading and writing, I’ll demonstrate growth.
7. To be… A Great Sleeper. Nothing functions well without rest, and I’ll continue to improve my sleep.
8. To be… Financially Sound. I will continue to work on building generational wealth for my family.
Each of these eight items requires hard work, focus, and dedication, which means they all require action. For each characteristic, I then laid out goals to accomplish.
While this may seem counterintuitive to the narrative of being versus doing, it’s actually aligned, just backwards. Instead of focusing on checking boxes, my goal is to focus on embodying the qualities at the top of this list. You can see the full list in the photo at the top of the article, where each quality has actionable items.
For example, under being an encourager, one of the things I want to do is date my wife more. It’s not to say I dated her and check a box, but to be a better encourager to my bride. I’m not eating healthier to check that box that I avoided donuts today, but to be more physically fit. And I’m attempting my first cold plunge this year, not just because it’s fun, but to cultivate adventure in my life.
Being Can Change the World
Ellen Johnson Sirleaf was the first female elected head of state in Africa. As a young woman, she repeatedly questioned Liberia’s ability and desire to stand up for equality, and she set a goal to become the person who could solve this problem.
Reading her speeches and memoirs, she outlined a clear picture of who she wanted to become. She aimed to be a serious, principled, resilient public servant. She sought to become someone who chose responsibility over comfort and discipline over ego.
Along her journey, she faced prison, death threats, and exile. Yet she never gave up on her dream to improve the nation in the face of naysayers and setbacks. Along the way, she achieved. She graduated from Harvard, participated in numerous levels of government, won the presidency, and ultimately earned the Nobel Peace Prize.
Her achievements in life were amazing, but her focus on the person she wanted to be was what truly enabled her to change Liberia. She understood that being is more important than doing, and doing serves being.
Who Do We Want to Be This Year?
It’s a worthy exercise to understand the type of person we want to be. I mentioned that my previous goals scared me, as per the Ellen Johnson Sirleaf quote. I’ll tell you, attempting to become a better person is even scarier, in an exciting way.
This year, in 2026, who do you want to become, and how will you become that person? Whatever you pursue, focus on lifting others up. The more we can make it about other people and less about ourselves, the greater our influence on the world!
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